Valentine's Day

I got this in an email newsletter from Dennis & Barbara Rainey's Moments for Couples, telling about a Valentine's fiasco. The wife had remembered and prepared her gift and card only to be given after her husband had given her his gift; but he had forgotten Valentine's Day! After much hinting, he went upstairs to retire for the night and (I have to quote the rest from here for best effect) "found his wife sitting bolt upright in bed. Somehow the temperature felt noticeably cooler in that room than in the other parts of the house.

'What's the matter? What'd I do?' He did a super-quick scan of his usual offenses. Everything checked out.

'Tomorrow morning,' she said through clenched teeth, 'I expect to find a gift in the driveway that goes from zero to two hundred in less than six seconds. And it had better be there!'

With that, she snatched her pillow and blanket and trudged off, presumably to the downstairs sofa, leaving Sam standing there looking very unmanly, totally exposed as a Valentine forgetter. But his pride wasn't about to be threatened so easily.

The next morning his wife found a gift box in the driveway. She tore it open and looked inside.

It was a bathroom scale.

Sam has been missing since Friday.

HAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY!