Friday, January 21, 2011

A Fear I have For My Children

"Say, 'Please.'"


I've had this "conversation" too many times in the past month, and it's left me frustrated and confused. Was it out of my 19 -month -old's stubbornness that she kept refusing to say please or was it just a lack of understanding and immaturity? I just didn't want her to grow up and be "that kid" who was ill-mannered and rude.

In this country, we really are privileged. For our family, we are above the poverty line, yet my husband does not bring in the "big bucks" that we think he deserves. We are forced to make choices about how to spend our money -- what can we actually afford without going into debt and what can we splurge on. And I want my children to realize the gifts and opportunities they have, some as simple as the freedoms all Americans share. I've interacted with enough children and adults who come from an arrogant perspective that they deserve or are entitled to certain things that I want to help my children truly appreciate all they have.

This was part of the Blog Dare Prompt What I Fear Most For My Children.


  1. You have an award!


  2. Maybe you can teach her the sign for please and tell her she can either sign it or say it. This worked with my 21 month old when he was around 18 months old and now he loves to say please (pvvvvvvv!).

    We live in a time where everyone expects everything to be theirs without earning it, and any child who is taught to say please can grow up to show respect.

  3. Stick with it - I never let up on my son about please, thank you, and excuse me. He's almost 10 and even though I still have to ride him about it sometimes, I'm always getting told he's one of the most polite children. Worth the effort for sure!

  4. Yep, just stick with it. She'll get it :-)

    It's such an important message to impart, just being grateful. We actually live below the poverty line and it's always been very important for me to let my kids know that even though we don't have a lot, we have what we need, we have each other and we have more than some people have. We need to be grateful for all of it. We live in an area that's typically well above us economically. Most of my kids are old enough now that they're really appalled by the sense of entitlement & ingratitude others have.

  5. A lot of little ones that age say "no" because it gets a reaction -- not because they really mean it.

    Like a pp I taught my kids the sign for please (and thank you too). I wouldn't give them what they wanted unless they said or signed please.

    Now they are 7 and 4 and if I see them forgetting their manners I catch their eye and sign to them. They often say it as they sign it. It saves me from calling out "What do you say?!?!?" and embarrassing them... lol...

    Thanks for following me back!

  6. So true. Know what though? My 19 month old loves "no" too, but I'm convinced it's just because it's an easy word to say because she also says no when I ask if she wants a cookie or if she loves her mommy. And I KNOW both are actually yes answers!

  7. awww - atleast your kiddo can say "no". ash hasn't spoken any words yet and he's 19 month old too...waiting for his precious words and even if it's a "no", i would be happy abt it hahaha

    ~ash's mum